I don't remember when or how these tracks were made, but I do remember a longing and a tiresome dance between hope and despair. I have always been searching for something true in music but never really finding it. Just sometimes catching a shadow or a small flicker of something beyond the actual sounds. My first memories in this life are of music, and I still remember the feeling clearly: it was as if there was a distant memory somewhere beyond the sounds, a different world, an infinite love, ever expanding. It can not be found in the sounds, but the sounds can point to it. It is beyond the duality of beauty and ugliness, light and dark. It is nothingness but at the same time it is fuller and richer than anything we can find in the world of objects. All things come from there and return there again after doing a little meaningless dance in which they believe they can exist apart from this. It is silly for me to try to express what it is, but I know that all the music I ever made have been vain attempts at capturing this fleeting realm and bringing it into something finite - like a piece of music with a beginning and an end. This will forever be impossibe, for what object or sound could capture the eternal? It can only dream.